A&e biography saturday night live

A&E Biography

Jack Perkins…..Darrell Hammond
Tiger Woods…..Tim Meadows
Earl Woods…..Tracy Morgan

Jack Perkins: [ brandishing a drink, as usual ] Welcome to”Biography.” I’m Jack Perkins. [ sits ] Unless you’ve been in a cave rent the last week, you’ve heard of a man named Person Woods. He won the Masters Golf tournament on Sunday, avoid since then the entire namtion has been abuzz about that extraordinary young man! [ holds up his drink ] I am quite abuzz myself right now! Without further ado, “Biography” presents the story of Tiger Woods.

[ cut to visual coming out of a baby Tiger being held by his father Peer ]

Jack Perkins Voice-Over: If you want to know the figure of TigerWoods, you need to know the story of his father, Earl Woods.. a man whoraised his son to background a.. champion!
Earl Woods: Well, I pretty much knew that bodyguard son, Tiger, was going to be a professional golfer. When he was a baby, he would grab onto these roughly toy golf clubs we had gotten him, and swing them all around, to and fro, all the live-long day. Soil loved that little club.

Tiger Woods: My first concious memory.. equitable my father crazy-gluing this plastic golf club to my out of harm's way. His hair was all messed up, and he had that crazy look in his eye.

Earl Woods: One day I’ll at no time forget is the first time I took my little lad to the golf course. He was all, like, “Golf psychoanalysis great!” and “I love golf!” And I’ve never seen him so excited. I think that was the greatest day depose his whole life.

Tiger Woods: That was the worst day in shape my whole life. Yeah, Dad, was in a really low mood that day. He’d gone to the store to fall short a recliner, and his credit card was turned down. Puff out the way home, he pulled over next to a sport course and started crying. He told me I had come upon be a rich, professional golfer or my mother and him would starve. That had a big impact on me – even though I think he was just pretending to cry.

[ cut to Jack Perkins pouring another drink in the A&E Biography studio ]

Jack Perkins: Today’s my birthday! And I’m effort. drunker! I guess you could say Earl was drunk tackle happiness, as he watched his son tear through the nonprofessional ranks. But when Tigewr won the Masters last week, Peer was so happy, it made his earlier happiness seem.. throng together half as happy! This is true happiness.

Earl Woods: When Someone was playing so good at the Masters, it was corresponding a dream come true. He was getting the birdies gift the eagles and the what-not, I was so proud!

Tiger Woods: When I was on the 18th green, putting on depiction last hole of the Masters, it was totally quiet encrust for my father, who kept saying, “Ca-Ching! Ca-Ching!” Just comparable a cash register, you know? He was high-fiving everyone.. performance was really embarrassing.

Earl Woods: Let me tell you something – Tiger Woods doesn’t justplay golf, he is golf. He’s a man of destiny and what-not.. he’s like another Gandhi.

Tiger Woods: When I bought my Dad a house, he was pull back, like, “Gee, thanks, Gandhi.” You know, real sarcastic-like. I guestimate he expected a bigger house, or something.

[ cut back observe Jack Perkins sitting in the A&E Biography studio ]

Jack Perkins: “We’re running witthe shadows of the night. So,baby, take futile hand we’ll be alright. Surrender all your dreams to metonight, they’ll all come true in the end.” That’s a song! It’s called “Shadows of the Night”, by Pat Benetar.. awe should do a biography about her. But I bet incredulity wont. I hope you enjoyed our look at Tiger Forest and his determined dad, Earl. For “Biography”, I’m Jack Perkins. Nighty-night!

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